SONA-VAGAN PART 2

SONA-vagan!

Days before the president’s state of the nation address, militant lawmakers have decided to boycott the opening of sessions. They allege PGMA will recite the same antics all over again.
SONA vagan!
oOo
House security officials say they are experts in ensuring the safety of SONA, having done the same preparations since time immemorial. Authorities claim GMA’s last SONA as president faces no serious threat.
They want to be sure that next year GMA will deliver her first SONA as Prime Minister.
oOo
Some fear the joint session of congress during SONA might be used to railroad the approval of the hotly-contested Constituent Assembly resolution calling for Charter change. Con-Ass proponents will push for joint voting, relegating senators to the sidelines.
SONA vabits! Gulo yan!
oOo
But congressmen pushing for the Con-Ass resolution have assured no such thing will happen.
SONA naman.
oOo
In a nutshell, PGMA is expected to recap her administration’s feats during her incumbency. A matter of pure political and economic cosmetics, say her critics.
This is a job for Dr. Vicky Belo!
oOo
No. She will not reveal her new CUP size and thank her plastic surgeon.
oOo
Sen. Richard Gordon wants amnesty given to Abu Sayyaf bandits. He explains this will finally cure the problem.
Then he will take them in as Red Cross volunteers! OMG!
oOo
They say no ransom was paid for the release of ICRC volunteers who were held captive by the Abu Sayyaf for months. Local officials say only money intended as “cigarette allowance” (panigarilyo) was sent to the group.
Hoping ASG members die of lung cancer! Nice trick.
oOo
Last week, Sec. Ronnie Puno of the DILG was hugging and kissing his pet dog, Magnus Portis, as he announced an all-out “law enforcement” campaign against the ASG.
I think the DILG secretary would have appeared more threatening if he brought in a PIG!
oOo
With this in mind, the armed forces should review its policy on the use of its K-9 units. Instead of dogs, soldiers should try releasing hordes of SWINE in the jungles of Sulu and Basilan or drop double dead meat from the air.
No harm in trying, anyway.